"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." ~Proverbs 3:5
Ever since I became a Christian, this has been my "go-to" verse. No matter what circumstance I was facing, I would turn to this verse to help me through.
Loneliness as a single mom.
Stress beyond belief while working full time, caring for my infant son and being the care-giver for my brother as he went through chemo and radiation treatments.
Exhaustion when my boys were babies.
Pouring myself into a new ministry at church.
Devastation while I walked by my dear friend as she navigated the new world of widow-hood.
Heart-broken over the struggles of my friends and family.
Trying to make the best parenting decisions.
Navigating the wonderful and complicated world of marriage.
Changes.
Failures.
Successes.
Unexpected doors opening.
Others closing suddenly.
Miscommunications.
Blessings.
Consequences.
Losses.
Joys.
Struggles.
No matter the situation, I go to this verse. I quote it. I send others to it. I have it on a picture in my room and on a 3X5 card on my kitchen cabinet.
I love this verse.
Until recently, however, I have never felt tested on it. I would recite it and read it, meditate on it and pray it. And it always brought me a sense of peace...sometimes large, sometimes small. It was my reassuring verse. It told me that even when I can only see a small piece of the big picture, He sees it all...beginning and end.
But now, it is more of a challenge. I am faced with circumstances that I do not understand at all, not even a little bit. Even the small piece of the big picture is blurry and confusing. The more I try to understand it and make sense of it, the more confused I get. I seek Him and think I know His answer, only to have a door shut in my face. Am I hearing His voice, or am I pursuing my own agenda? I thought I was following Him. I was trying to walk with Him. Now, I don't know. I am just one big ball of emotional confusion!
So now when this verse comes to mind, it challenges me. Am I still going to trust God with all my heart when I am in the midst of chaos and confusion? When things are not going the way I thought they would, do I still have complete faith that He is at work? Do I fully trust God's plan when I cannot understand what's going on?
I can't lean on my own understanding right now because I don't understand anything!
Maybe that is the lesson in it all. Maybe I have been relying too much on my own understanding of things. Maybe this is all to show me how to trust in the LORD with all my heart when I have not even an ounce of understanding.
I am finding that to be a very difficult task indeed.
"When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer.” ~Corrie ten Boom
LORD, help me to be still and know that you are God.
Psalm 46:10
Showing posts with label trust. Show all posts
Showing posts with label trust. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Update on Olga
***Their Chip-In account is up to $710!!! If was all give what we can, they will be fully funded this week. We can do this!!!***
I wanted to give you all an update on the precious little girl named Olga who truly has changed my life.
About a month ago, I joined many other bloggers in an attempt to raise money so that her forever family could bring her home. You can read my post here: A Day to Save Olga. What an amazing response we saw! In just a few days time, so many people responded to the call by praying, donating and/or sharing the story with others.
I come to you now asking you to rally together once again. While they have raised around $20,000 so far, the anticipated costs for this adoption is around $35,000. For those not familiar with international adoption, you are probably looking at this number in shock! I know I did when I first became aware of it. It is outrageous that it should cost that much money! But, no matter how disgusted we are by the complicated, over-priced system, the fact remains that these children NEED TO BE RESCUED! If you haven't read my previous post, please take a minute to do so.
These children are unwanted. They are considered defective and disposable.
And yet, there are loving families here that desperately want to open their homes to these babies. The Abell family has the means to support another child. They have the space, the love, the ability, and the desire. But no matter how much they are willing and able to bring another child into their life, that $35,000 initial cost is overwhelmingly difficult to come by. How many people do you know that have that kind of money just lying around?
If they had chosen to bring another child into their family biologically, this would not be nearly as complicated. Medical insurance covers most of the expenses involved in a pregnancy. Unfortunately, there is not equivalent insurance coverage for adoption expenses. So because they chose to rescue a child that is in desperate need of a family, they have this enormous up-front cost.
This is not a situation where the family is getting in over their heads. They have not made this decision lightly. They are not going into it blindly.
They are following God's call on their family.
Most of us at one point or another help to raise money for something. We raise money so that people can get the medical treatment they need. We raise money to help fund research for various diseases. We raise money for organizations that help end human trafficking. We raise money to help people recover from natural disasters. We raise money all the time for so many different causes. But they are all similar in that they are there to help others in their time of need.
This is not a welfare case. This is not supporting someone who just doesn't want to work to get what they want. This is not enabling someone who doesn't know how to manage their money.
The Abell family has cut out all non-essential expenses such as "cable, eating out, haircuts, birthday parties, vacation, knick knacks, etc." Chris has taken on a second job and works extra hours any chance he gets. They are scrimping and saving and working. Jenn is making and selling various items. Yard sales, bake sales, MaryKay sales. They are doing everything they can to bring their daughter home. You can read more about their journey, their struggles and their undying love, hope and determination for their daughter in their latest blog post here.
Won't you be a part of helping them bring her home?
What can you give? $10? $25? $50? More than that? Some tax return money that could be used to help a little girl get home?
I want to challenge you to be a huge part in this wonderful story.
First, pray for this family. Pray for peace and wisdom and strength. Pray for miracles in the process. Pray for Olga...for her safety and health.
Go to the family's blog, Saving Our Starfish, and donate to their "Dossier Submission Chip-In" account on the right-hand side of the page. Give what you can. Check out all of their fundraisers and participate. They currently have $635 towards their goal of $5458. Let's all join in and blow the top off that goal!
Then, share this story. Email it to all your friends. "Share" it on Facebook.
I have seen what can happen when we rally together.
Let's do it again.
I wanted to give you all an update on the precious little girl named Olga who truly has changed my life.
About a month ago, I joined many other bloggers in an attempt to raise money so that her forever family could bring her home. You can read my post here: A Day to Save Olga. What an amazing response we saw! In just a few days time, so many people responded to the call by praying, donating and/or sharing the story with others.
I come to you now asking you to rally together once again. While they have raised around $20,000 so far, the anticipated costs for this adoption is around $35,000. For those not familiar with international adoption, you are probably looking at this number in shock! I know I did when I first became aware of it. It is outrageous that it should cost that much money! But, no matter how disgusted we are by the complicated, over-priced system, the fact remains that these children NEED TO BE RESCUED! If you haven't read my previous post, please take a minute to do so.
These children are unwanted. They are considered defective and disposable.
And yet, there are loving families here that desperately want to open their homes to these babies. The Abell family has the means to support another child. They have the space, the love, the ability, and the desire. But no matter how much they are willing and able to bring another child into their life, that $35,000 initial cost is overwhelmingly difficult to come by. How many people do you know that have that kind of money just lying around?
If they had chosen to bring another child into their family biologically, this would not be nearly as complicated. Medical insurance covers most of the expenses involved in a pregnancy. Unfortunately, there is not equivalent insurance coverage for adoption expenses. So because they chose to rescue a child that is in desperate need of a family, they have this enormous up-front cost.
This is not a situation where the family is getting in over their heads. They have not made this decision lightly. They are not going into it blindly.
They are following God's call on their family.
Most of us at one point or another help to raise money for something. We raise money so that people can get the medical treatment they need. We raise money to help fund research for various diseases. We raise money for organizations that help end human trafficking. We raise money to help people recover from natural disasters. We raise money all the time for so many different causes. But they are all similar in that they are there to help others in their time of need.
This is not a welfare case. This is not supporting someone who just doesn't want to work to get what they want. This is not enabling someone who doesn't know how to manage their money.
The Abell family has cut out all non-essential expenses such as "cable, eating out, haircuts, birthday parties, vacation, knick knacks, etc." Chris has taken on a second job and works extra hours any chance he gets. They are scrimping and saving and working. Jenn is making and selling various items. Yard sales, bake sales, MaryKay sales. They are doing everything they can to bring their daughter home. You can read more about their journey, their struggles and their undying love, hope and determination for their daughter in their latest blog post here.
Won't you be a part of helping them bring her home?
What can you give? $10? $25? $50? More than that? Some tax return money that could be used to help a little girl get home?
I want to challenge you to be a huge part in this wonderful story.
First, pray for this family. Pray for peace and wisdom and strength. Pray for miracles in the process. Pray for Olga...for her safety and health.
Go to the family's blog, Saving Our Starfish, and donate to their "Dossier Submission Chip-In" account on the right-hand side of the page. Give what you can. Check out all of their fundraisers and participate. They currently have $635 towards their goal of $5458. Let's all join in and blow the top off that goal!
Then, share this story. Email it to all your friends. "Share" it on Facebook.
I have seen what can happen when we rally together.
Let's do it again.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes....
Life seems to have expoded these last two weeks. So many things around me are changing. Dear sister-friends are moving far away. My "circle" is changing dynamics. God is moving and shaking our lives in many ways.
It is exciting.
And it is terrifying.
You see, the future I thought was before me has changed considerably, unexpectedly. I trust God's plan...I do. But I mourn the future I thought I was going to have. I am intrigued by new prospects, and deeply saddened at the thought of saying goodbye to what has become so much a part of who I am.
I have taken these last two weeks off from writing anything for various reasons. My emotions are so jumbled right now...My entire house has been horribly sick...My mental capacity has been greatly diminished. All in all, I just haven't felt clear about much of anything.
So much change.
So much still up in the air.
My heart still aches for those sweet children around the world who just want to be loved. My heart still aches for the children here in America who are abused and neglected. My heart still aches for the little ones who are fighting for their lives, battling cancers and other life-threatening illnesses. My heart still aches for the babies who are never given a chance at life. My heart still aches for the believers around the world who are tortured and harassed and killed because of their faith in Jesus Christ. My heart still aches for those who do not know Him and His love. My heart still aches.
And I am still trying to figure out how I can make a difference. Don't get me wrong; I am fully committed to teaching and caring for my children. I feel that is certainly what God wants me to be doing...using my life to raise Godly men to send off into this world so that they can make a difference. We are in training mode, I am the teacher/trainer and this is absolutely a noble call.
But, how do I teach my boys to live boldly for the Lord when our daily lives are filled with meeting our own needs and living in such comfort? How do we live out our faith in a way that really changes something and someone? If my goal is to raise men who will be bold and strong in Jesus Christ, who will serve Him whole-heartedly, who will affect those around them, then what should I be doing now that teaches them how to do that? I can read them great stories about amazing servants and missionaries every day, but is that enough?
Children do retain what they hear. But what they see and live is what shapes who they are and will become.
These are all the things I have had swirling around in my mind and heart lately.
Heavy questions.
Heavy emotions.
As God is completely shaking my world around me--taking treasured things away, giving me new and exciting paths to pursue--I am trying to sort out what it all means in our daily lives. What steps of obedience do we need to be taking? When do we need to be still? When do we need to step out of our "comfort-zone"?
And to top it all off, with each step of obedience, the enemy is there, attacking us on all sides...trying to distract us and discourage us from living boldly for the Lord. The enemy does not want us to change our comfortable, ineffective lives.
God is truly moving. In BIG ways. In many lives. All around us.
As my world is changing considerably, I strive to cling to the One who never changes.
"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.
Rescue me from my enemies, O LORD, for I hide myself in you.
Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground."
Psalm 143:8-10
It is exciting.
And it is terrifying.
You see, the future I thought was before me has changed considerably, unexpectedly. I trust God's plan...I do. But I mourn the future I thought I was going to have. I am intrigued by new prospects, and deeply saddened at the thought of saying goodbye to what has become so much a part of who I am.
I have taken these last two weeks off from writing anything for various reasons. My emotions are so jumbled right now...My entire house has been horribly sick...My mental capacity has been greatly diminished. All in all, I just haven't felt clear about much of anything.
So much change.
So much still up in the air.
My heart still aches for those sweet children around the world who just want to be loved. My heart still aches for the children here in America who are abused and neglected. My heart still aches for the little ones who are fighting for their lives, battling cancers and other life-threatening illnesses. My heart still aches for the babies who are never given a chance at life. My heart still aches for the believers around the world who are tortured and harassed and killed because of their faith in Jesus Christ. My heart still aches for those who do not know Him and His love. My heart still aches.
And I am still trying to figure out how I can make a difference. Don't get me wrong; I am fully committed to teaching and caring for my children. I feel that is certainly what God wants me to be doing...using my life to raise Godly men to send off into this world so that they can make a difference. We are in training mode, I am the teacher/trainer and this is absolutely a noble call.
But, how do I teach my boys to live boldly for the Lord when our daily lives are filled with meeting our own needs and living in such comfort? How do we live out our faith in a way that really changes something and someone? If my goal is to raise men who will be bold and strong in Jesus Christ, who will serve Him whole-heartedly, who will affect those around them, then what should I be doing now that teaches them how to do that? I can read them great stories about amazing servants and missionaries every day, but is that enough?
Children do retain what they hear. But what they see and live is what shapes who they are and will become.
These are all the things I have had swirling around in my mind and heart lately.
Heavy questions.
Heavy emotions.
As God is completely shaking my world around me--taking treasured things away, giving me new and exciting paths to pursue--I am trying to sort out what it all means in our daily lives. What steps of obedience do we need to be taking? When do we need to be still? When do we need to step out of our "comfort-zone"?
And to top it all off, with each step of obedience, the enemy is there, attacking us on all sides...trying to distract us and discourage us from living boldly for the Lord. The enemy does not want us to change our comfortable, ineffective lives.
God is truly moving. In BIG ways. In many lives. All around us.
As my world is changing considerably, I strive to cling to the One who never changes.
"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.
Rescue me from my enemies, O LORD, for I hide myself in you.
Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground."
Psalm 143:8-10
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Renewal
Day to day, my world stays pretty much the same:
Wake up.
Drink LARGE cup of coffee.
Check emails.
Make breakfast.
Clean-up.
Educate my children.
Make lunch.
Clean-up.
Laundry.
A little quiet-time for everyone.
More educating.
More cleaning.
Make dinner.
Read out loud to kids.
Clean-up.
Read out loud to kids.
Clean-up.
Bed-time routine.
Tuck kids in.
Watch a little tv.
Hang out with hubby.
Read my book.
Go to sleep.
Repeat.
Of course, there are the days we have piano lessons, Community Bible Study, homeschool co-op group, Mom's Night Out, church, grocery shopping, library trips, doctors and dentist appointments and other unplanned interruptions. But for the most part, that is what my days have looked like for the past few years. And I am pretty sure that is what my days will continue to look like for quite some time.
And I LOVE it. I truly wouldn't trade it for anything. I enjoy the routine we have settled into. I love my life. I love my family. I love my friends. I love where God has put me.
Sometimes I just sit back and think about where I was 10 years ago, and where I am now. From uncertainty, confusion, loneliness, depression, and self-centeredness to faith, purpose, love, contentment, joy and service. God is truly amazing! And yet, He is so far from being done with me....thankfully.
I am going through another growth-spurt right now. Do you remember how much growing-pains hurt? I often have to massage my kids' legs when they are having growing pains. I will sit next to them on their bed, rub their legs, tell them that there is a good reason for the aches, and pray that God would relieve the pain soon. They eventually drift off to sleep and are better in the morning.
I am waiting for the morning.
God is working in me. He is doing something big in my heart and soul. It is fantastic. And it is painful.
He is reviving my passion for Him, returning me to that first love spoken of in Revelation 2. God commends the church at Ephesus:
"I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place."
I want to be a light in this world. I want God's light to shine through me. Jesus tells us that we are the light of this world:
"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:14-16
How many times have we as believers read that portion of scripture and taken it to mean we need to lead good lives, free of profanity and excess alcohol, full of smiles and helping little old ladies across the street? I know I have. Let your light shine. Almost makes me want to break out in song... "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine..."
But, let's take a minute to view that scripture in light of the Revelation passage. Here God acknowledges the good deeds you do, but says they are worthless without an all-consuming passion for Him. He actually says that He will "remove the lampstand from its place." If our hearts are not overwhelmed with love for Him, He will remove the light! Ouch!
Do you remember when you first accepted Jesus Christ as your Saviour? Do you remember how full of passion and love you were? How much you wanted to shout to the world and tell everyone about His amazing love and forgiveness? You actually spent a good deal of time reading His Word and praising Him? Prayer time was not an obligation, but something you looked forward to?
How long has it been since you felt that way? Life got in the way. Schedules got busy. Kids got sick. Laundry piled up. Traffic happened. People made you angry. Sleep eluded you. TV shows got you hooked. That third glass of wine called your name.
Little by little, you abandoned that first love...you became lukewarm.
God makes it very clear how he feels about that.
"So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth." Revelation 3:16
That is where I have been residing for quite some time. In the comfortable, cozy lukewarm-ness. It is safe here. It is not too challenging. Here there is no fear of rejection from those around me. Here there is no urgency to spread God's Word. Here there is no sorrow over the millions of people who are mistreated, abandoned, starving and on death's doorstep. Here I can happily pick out new window coverings and get regular pedicures. In this lukewarm-ness, I don't have to stress myself out with the worries of the others. Here I can go to church, do all the right things, but never have my heart involved.
Thankfully, He doesn't leave us there with no escape.
"Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me." Revelation 3:20
I recently opened that door. Thus the growing pains. He is pulling me out of this lukewarm state and setting me on fire again. And in the process, I am finding my heart is so full of love and sorrow. Love for Him and His creation. Sorrow at how we treat Him and His creation. Those two emotions together are so overwhelming.
I know this process is necessary. I know this is growing me spiritually, emotionally, personally. I am still praying that God would relieve the pain soon, but I wouldn't opt out of this experience for anything in this world. I feel the fire. I feel the love. I feel the passion. They are building in me day by day. And I pray that I am never the same.
We know that God makes all things new. I am learning that this is not a one time deal. He continues to renew us time and again. Little by little, growth-spurt after growth-spurt, we are becoming more like Him.
And I am oh so grateful.
So, while my day-to-day routine hasn't changed for quite some time, I am completely different.
I know that morning will come. I also know that there will be other nights. But if I have learned anything, I have learned that our God is faithful and He will bring me yet another new and glorious morning.
Above all, I know that God is drawing me nearer to Him.
That makes all the growing pains worth it.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Aching Faith
Do you ever feel so overwhelmed with emotion that you feel like you just might burst? Part of you wants to scream at the top of your lungs and the other part wants to crawl back in bed and pull the covers over your head. You literally physically ache all over.
Lately, I am there more often than I am not.
The emotions. The longing. The impatience. They are so hard to handle each day. But, in a way, it is this experience, these difficult emotions that have brought me so close to God. I feel Him. I hear Him. I see His hands working all around me. Would I have been able to experience God in this way without experiencing the difficulty? Probably not.
I find myself turning to the book of Psalms often. In the past, this book just confused me; David at times seems so bi-polar. Such as in Psalm 88 where he says, "But I cry to you for help, O LORD; in the morning my prayer comes before you. Why, O LORD, do you reject me and hide your face from me?" Then the very next Psalm begins with: "I will sing of the LORD's great love forever; with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known through all generations." The entire books seems to be a roller-coaster-ride of emotions, of doubt and praise.
I get it now.
God continues to show me His unfailing love and faithfulness everywhere--through songs and people and sermons and things I read--even while I am in the midst of the fire. While it feels like I am not getting an answer to my pleas, He is showing me His love and comfort.
My heart still aches.
I am still overwhelmed.
But I know He is here with me, holding me, working things out in ways I cannot yet see.
I am confident that He has great plans for me. And yet, I still cry out to Him.
Never before have the Psalms struck such a chord in me. I am understanding now that David was not bi-polar. He was human.
And so today, I will leave you with a verse that sums up where I am...full of praise and trust in God, even as I cry out to Him with every aching fiber of my being:
"The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me;
your love, O Lord, endures forever --
do not abandon the works of your hands."
~Psalm 138:8
Lately, I am there more often than I am not.
The emotions. The longing. The impatience. They are so hard to handle each day. But, in a way, it is this experience, these difficult emotions that have brought me so close to God. I feel Him. I hear Him. I see His hands working all around me. Would I have been able to experience God in this way without experiencing the difficulty? Probably not.
I find myself turning to the book of Psalms often. In the past, this book just confused me; David at times seems so bi-polar. Such as in Psalm 88 where he says, "But I cry to you for help, O LORD; in the morning my prayer comes before you. Why, O LORD, do you reject me and hide your face from me?" Then the very next Psalm begins with: "I will sing of the LORD's great love forever; with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known through all generations." The entire books seems to be a roller-coaster-ride of emotions, of doubt and praise.
I get it now.
God continues to show me His unfailing love and faithfulness everywhere--through songs and people and sermons and things I read--even while I am in the midst of the fire. While it feels like I am not getting an answer to my pleas, He is showing me His love and comfort.
My heart still aches.
I am still overwhelmed.
But I know He is here with me, holding me, working things out in ways I cannot yet see.
I am confident that He has great plans for me. And yet, I still cry out to Him.
Never before have the Psalms struck such a chord in me. I am understanding now that David was not bi-polar. He was human.
And so today, I will leave you with a verse that sums up where I am...full of praise and trust in God, even as I cry out to Him with every aching fiber of my being:
"The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me;
your love, O Lord, endures forever --
do not abandon the works of your hands."
~Psalm 138:8
Friday, February 25, 2011
Sign here, please.
I want. Please give it to me...soon.
I want. Please make it happen...right now.
I want. Can you show me that you are working on this?
That is what I tell God. "I trust you will do what I want, right away."
"Yes, but....I have something more for you."
Grrr. I really do want to be in His will. I really do want what He wants for my life. But I have found I have something in common with Corrie ten Boom. In her book "Tramp for the Lord" she talks about how she had a tendency to lay out all the plans and then ask for God's endorsement. She learned that it was much better to have Him draft up the plans and her just sign on the dotted line.
I still struggle with that. If what I want is a worthy, good thing that is in line with His Word...why can't I have it....now? Wow. How impatient am I?!
He has clearly shown me this week that His answer is not necessarily no...He just has other things He is working out first. So I sit. And wait. And trust. And watch Him do things in the process that I never imagined could be done.
While I am waiting, He is working.
He is teaching me right now. Teaching me that He doesn't hold out on you just to show you He can. He is working. He is orchestrating. He is refining you. He is using your experience to touch others. He is putting all the pieces in place. He is removing your notion that you have the ability to do it all on your own. He is giving you time to realize that He has the power to work the miracles, not you. He wants to bless you.
"Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!" Isaiah 30:18
Blessed are all who wait for him. Blessed.
I must admit, it doesn't feel like a blessing to wait. But maybe my waiting is blessing others. And maybe someday I will look back at my time of waiting and be able to see the full picture of the blessing in my own life as well.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
God helps us through our struggles so that we may help others. These two verses speak of God as being a God of compassion. Dictionary.com defines compassion as "a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering." God does not desire for us to stay in the difficulty. He works to alleviate the suffering. He sends others who understand to help us, so that the waiting will be bearable.
How thankful I am of dear friends who understand! I can never fully express how much they help! And I hope that I can be that help to others as well.
I have been finding so many amazing scriptures of comfort and hope and encouragement. Scriptures that show me how amazing and powerful God is. It is not through my strength, my wit, my wisdom, my abilities that anything happens. It is all God. I pray that the process, the journey, the waiting, and whatever comes of it all, will glorify Him. And that at some point, I might get better at this waiting thing and learn to let Him draft up the plans for me to sign on the dotted line!
"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory...for ever and ever! Amen." Ephesians 3:20-21
I want. Please make it happen...right now.
I want. Can you show me that you are working on this?
That is what I tell God. "I trust you will do what I want, right away."
"Yes, but....I have something more for you."
Grrr. I really do want to be in His will. I really do want what He wants for my life. But I have found I have something in common with Corrie ten Boom. In her book "Tramp for the Lord" she talks about how she had a tendency to lay out all the plans and then ask for God's endorsement. She learned that it was much better to have Him draft up the plans and her just sign on the dotted line.
I still struggle with that. If what I want is a worthy, good thing that is in line with His Word...why can't I have it....now? Wow. How impatient am I?!
He has clearly shown me this week that His answer is not necessarily no...He just has other things He is working out first. So I sit. And wait. And trust. And watch Him do things in the process that I never imagined could be done.
While I am waiting, He is working.
He is teaching me right now. Teaching me that He doesn't hold out on you just to show you He can. He is working. He is orchestrating. He is refining you. He is using your experience to touch others. He is putting all the pieces in place. He is removing your notion that you have the ability to do it all on your own. He is giving you time to realize that He has the power to work the miracles, not you. He wants to bless you.
"Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!" Isaiah 30:18
Blessed are all who wait for him. Blessed.
I must admit, it doesn't feel like a blessing to wait. But maybe my waiting is blessing others. And maybe someday I will look back at my time of waiting and be able to see the full picture of the blessing in my own life as well.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
God helps us through our struggles so that we may help others. These two verses speak of God as being a God of compassion. Dictionary.com defines compassion as "a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering." God does not desire for us to stay in the difficulty. He works to alleviate the suffering. He sends others who understand to help us, so that the waiting will be bearable.
How thankful I am of dear friends who understand! I can never fully express how much they help! And I hope that I can be that help to others as well.
I have been finding so many amazing scriptures of comfort and hope and encouragement. Scriptures that show me how amazing and powerful God is. It is not through my strength, my wit, my wisdom, my abilities that anything happens. It is all God. I pray that the process, the journey, the waiting, and whatever comes of it all, will glorify Him. And that at some point, I might get better at this waiting thing and learn to let Him draft up the plans for me to sign on the dotted line!
"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory...for ever and ever! Amen." Ephesians 3:20-21
Psalm 130
OUT of the depths I have cried to You, O LORD;
Lord, hear my voice! Let Your ears be attentive To the voice of my supplications.
If You, LORD, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who could stand?
But there is forgiveness with You, That You may be feared.
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, And in His word I do hope.
My soul waits for the Lord More than those who watch for the morning—
Yes, more than those who watch for the morning.
O Israel, hope in the LORD;
For with the LORD there is mercy, And with Him is abundant redemption.
And He shall redeem Israel From all his iniquities.
Lord, hear my voice! Let Your ears be attentive To the voice of my supplications.
If You, LORD, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who could stand?
But there is forgiveness with You, That You may be feared.
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, And in His word I do hope.
My soul waits for the Lord More than those who watch for the morning—
Yes, more than those who watch for the morning.
O Israel, hope in the LORD;
For with the LORD there is mercy, And with Him is abundant redemption.
And He shall redeem Israel From all his iniquities.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Waiting
I LOVE seeing God's miraculous timing in other people's lives. There are so many miracles happening every day. So many testimonies of His faithfulness and His perfect timing.
I have even experienced it in my own life.
So why is it so hard to wait on His timing with each new situation?
I have read amazing testimonies such as this wonderful story, For the Love of Vera. And this one, Announcing Peter's Family. After reading these, how can anyone deny the awesome beauty of God's divine plan?!
And yet, when you are the one waiting on an answer, the days and hours are so painfully and silently long.
Yet, I am reminded over and over again: If we let Him, He will orchestrate such incredible beauty in our lives in such a way that we will be left speechless. His plan and His timing are so much more amazing than we can ever even dream of!
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the LORD.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."
Isaiah 55:8-9
I have even experienced it in my own life.
So why is it so hard to wait on His timing with each new situation?
I have read amazing testimonies such as this wonderful story, For the Love of Vera. And this one, Announcing Peter's Family. After reading these, how can anyone deny the awesome beauty of God's divine plan?!
And yet, when you are the one waiting on an answer, the days and hours are so painfully and silently long.
Yet, I am reminded over and over again: If we let Him, He will orchestrate such incredible beauty in our lives in such a way that we will be left speechless. His plan and His timing are so much more amazing than we can ever even dream of!
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the LORD.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."
Isaiah 55:8-9
Sunday, February 20, 2011
The Other Option
It occurred to me the other day after I wrote the post Here I Am that I had completely left out an option. (And it is very odd that I forgot this particular option, as I have had personal experience with this one fairly recently.)
When God tells us to do something, we can argue like Moses, obey like Abraham, or take the other route: Jonah's.
Jonah didn't argue. Jonah certainly didn't obey.
"Jonah ran away from the Lord..." Jonah 1:3
In verse 2, God told him to go to Nineveh. Verse 3, Jonah runs in the other direction. No arguing. No debating. No negotiating. He just ran away.
This is a familiar story to most people. A cute kid's tale about a big fish that swallows Jonah. I never really got it, though. Until about a year and a half ago. I started the book "How to Study Your Bible" by Kay Arthur, which teaches you how to do inductive Bible study. To demonstrate the methods she is teaching, she uses the book of Jonah. God used this book to speak very clearly to me. I had been running from something he had been telling me to do for over a year. He was asking me to give up something. I really didn't want to.
So here I was reading the story of Jonah. I mean really reading it and analyzing it. Jonah heard God's instruction to head east. So, he went west. He hopped a boat, went below deck and fell asleep. God sent a great storm to wake him up. Still he slept.
This part of the story really spoke to me. It is the picture of a little kid with his fingers in his ears, saying, "La, la, la, la, la...I can't hear you!"
That was precisely what I was doing to God. I knew what He was telling me. I just didn't want to do it. I ignored Him...and experienced the resulting turbulence.
Jonah was finally awakened by the other terrified men on the boat. He accepted responsibility for the storm and asked to be thrown overboard. Immediately the storm was calmed. God sent a big fish to swallow Jonah. Think about that for a minute. It is not a cute kid's story. Jonah had no edible food, no drinkable water, no warmth. He was soaking wet and in utter darkness for three days and three nights. Really picture that. He was not a cartoon character. He was a real man in a real predicament. Talk about the ultimate "time-out"! He had nothing. He could do nothing to get himself out of this situation. And so, it was here that He cried out to God.
Why do we always wait until things are so bad--until everything has fallen apart, until we have exhausted all other resources--before we cry out to God?
Why do we hide from His divine plan and purpose for our life, thinking we know better than Him what is good for us?
Why are we so focused on our own comfort, rather than being willing to follow what He says and live fully by His grace and guidance?
Living out our own plan in our own strength will always fail. Living out God's plan with His provision will always succeed. Why do we have to repeat this lesson over and over again?!
Are you currently experiencing some great stress in your life? Could it be a result of not following God's instructions? Granted, not all stress in life is God trying to wake you up. But, sometimes it is.
Are you having a "big fish" encounter? Are you running away from God's plan, fingers in ears? After studying the book of Jonah, it became very clear to me that I was indeed doing so. I cried out to God for forgiveness and asked Him to help me obey Him. He has been faithful to do so each and every day since.
Don't wait for God to send the storm. And if you are in the storm right now, don't wait for the fish!!!
Jonah. Moses. Or Abraham. Who are you going to be like?
Whatever He is calling you to do, do it. He will help you. He has promised not to leave you. Just like He did with each of these men, He will give you what you need when you need it.
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10
Trust Him.
Follow Him.
Like the old hymn says, "Trust and Obey":
to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
When God tells us to do something, we can argue like Moses, obey like Abraham, or take the other route: Jonah's.
Jonah didn't argue. Jonah certainly didn't obey.
"Jonah ran away from the Lord..." Jonah 1:3
In verse 2, God told him to go to Nineveh. Verse 3, Jonah runs in the other direction. No arguing. No debating. No negotiating. He just ran away.
This is a familiar story to most people. A cute kid's tale about a big fish that swallows Jonah. I never really got it, though. Until about a year and a half ago. I started the book "How to Study Your Bible" by Kay Arthur, which teaches you how to do inductive Bible study. To demonstrate the methods she is teaching, she uses the book of Jonah. God used this book to speak very clearly to me. I had been running from something he had been telling me to do for over a year. He was asking me to give up something. I really didn't want to.
So here I was reading the story of Jonah. I mean really reading it and analyzing it. Jonah heard God's instruction to head east. So, he went west. He hopped a boat, went below deck and fell asleep. God sent a great storm to wake him up. Still he slept.
This part of the story really spoke to me. It is the picture of a little kid with his fingers in his ears, saying, "La, la, la, la, la...I can't hear you!"
That was precisely what I was doing to God. I knew what He was telling me. I just didn't want to do it. I ignored Him...and experienced the resulting turbulence.
Jonah was finally awakened by the other terrified men on the boat. He accepted responsibility for the storm and asked to be thrown overboard. Immediately the storm was calmed. God sent a big fish to swallow Jonah. Think about that for a minute. It is not a cute kid's story. Jonah had no edible food, no drinkable water, no warmth. He was soaking wet and in utter darkness for three days and three nights. Really picture that. He was not a cartoon character. He was a real man in a real predicament. Talk about the ultimate "time-out"! He had nothing. He could do nothing to get himself out of this situation. And so, it was here that He cried out to God.
Why do we always wait until things are so bad--until everything has fallen apart, until we have exhausted all other resources--before we cry out to God?
Why do we hide from His divine plan and purpose for our life, thinking we know better than Him what is good for us?
Why are we so focused on our own comfort, rather than being willing to follow what He says and live fully by His grace and guidance?
Living out our own plan in our own strength will always fail. Living out God's plan with His provision will always succeed. Why do we have to repeat this lesson over and over again?!
Are you currently experiencing some great stress in your life? Could it be a result of not following God's instructions? Granted, not all stress in life is God trying to wake you up. But, sometimes it is.
Are you having a "big fish" encounter? Are you running away from God's plan, fingers in ears? After studying the book of Jonah, it became very clear to me that I was indeed doing so. I cried out to God for forgiveness and asked Him to help me obey Him. He has been faithful to do so each and every day since.
Don't wait for God to send the storm. And if you are in the storm right now, don't wait for the fish!!!
Jonah. Moses. Or Abraham. Who are you going to be like?
Whatever He is calling you to do, do it. He will help you. He has promised not to leave you. Just like He did with each of these men, He will give you what you need when you need it.
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10
Trust Him.
Follow Him.
Like the old hymn says, "Trust and Obey":
When we walk with the Lord
in the light of his word,
what a glory he sheds on our way!
While we do his good will,
he abides with us still,
and with all who will trust and obey.
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
Not a burden we bear,
not a sorrow we share,
but our toil he doth richly repay;
not a grief or a loss,
not a frown or a cross,
but is blest if we trust and obey.
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
But we never can prove
the delights of his love
until all on the altar we lay;
for the favor he shows,
for the joy he bestows,
are for them who will trust and obey.
Trust and obey, for there's no other way
to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
Then in fellowship sweet
we will sit at his feet,
or we'll walk by his side in the way;
what he says we will do,
where he sends we will go;
never fear, only trust and obey.
Trust and obey, for there's no other way to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
here i am
I ask your forgiveness right from the start. My thoughts are all jumbled up in my brain today. Maybe it's the lack of sleep. Maybe it's all that has been weighing on my heart lately. Probably a bit of both.
I have often struggled with praying honestly, "Lord, use me. I am here to serve you as you see fit. Whatever you want for my life, I want. Nothing more. Nothing less. Nothing else. Lord, I want your will." You see, I am terribly afraid He will do it!
What if He asks me to uproot my family? Move across the globe? Start a time-consuming ministry in an unknown area? Give up things I hold dear? Step out of my comfort-zone? Help a needy person? Adopt an orphan or two? What if He just asks me to walk across the room and share the Gospel with a stranger? Or worse yet, a family member?!
I often feel like God is calling out, asking for volunteers to step up to the front...and I am sitting in the back, sliding down in my chair with my head bowed trying to hide from view. "Please don't pick me....please don't pick me..." You see, I have an idea of what my future is going to be. A plan. The schooling plan. The vacation plan. The retirement plan. So many plans.
"Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21
Why is it so difficult to trust God? I mean trust completely. No lip-service, while keeping a tight grip on our own plans. Trust Him.
"Here I am." I love that phrase in the Bible. It has really been jumping out at me lately. There are numerous examples of men answering God, "Here I am."
Such as Abraham in Genesis 22. Abraham obeyed immediately. No hesitation. No questioning. No rationalizing why he shouldn't do it. Immediate obedience. The result? Tremendous blessing. "I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore...and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me." He got to experience first-hand, Jehovah Jireh...the God who provides.
Then there's good ole Moses. His story in Exodus 3 is certainly not his finest hour. And yet, this is a story I can identify with. This is my paraphrase of what went down:
God: "I have seen. I have heard. I have come to rescue them. So, now go."
Moses: "Who, me?"
God: "I will be with you."
Moses: "But, what if no one listens...."
God: "Tell them I sent you. They will listen."
Moses: "But, what if they don't believe me..."
God: "I will perform miracles."
Moses: "But, I'm not qualified..."
God: "Go. I will help you."
Moses: "O Lord, please send someone else to do it."
Then the God got very frustrated with Moses.
Wow. As a mom, I want to send Moses to his room until he can obey immediately without whining and arguing! Seriously!
But, oh...how we are all like Moses. Isn't it easy to come up with excuses why you shouldn't have to do what God has told you to do? Reasons why it is someone else's calling and not yours?
Abraham or Moses? Who do you want to be like? I seem to be more like Moses, but desperately want to be more like Abraham.
When God opens your eyes to something that calls for action, DO SOMETHING! Be like Samuel and say, "Speak, for your servant is listening."
But what if He hasn't "called" you? You don't feel any great "calling" on your life?
Open your Bible. If you proclaim the name of Jesus...if you are a Christian and want to live a faithful life: Open your Bible. It doesn't take a scholar to find the "calls":
"Rescue those being led away to death; hold back those staggering toward slaughter. If you say, 'But we knew nothing about this,' does not he who weighs the heart perceive it? Does not he who guards your life know it? Will he not repay everyone according to what they have done?" Proverbs 24:11-12
"Pure and lasting religion in the sight of God our Father means that we must care for orphans..." James 1:27 NLT
"Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves..." Proverbs 31:8
"Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act." Proverbs 3:27
"But if anyone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need and refuses to help--how can God's love be in that person?" I John 3:17 NLT
"Whoever Welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me." Mark 9:37
Or how about this one:
"Then the King will say to those on the right, `Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.'
`Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? When did we ever see you sick or in prison, and visit you?' 'And the King will tell them, `I assure you, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!'"
"Then the King will turn to those on the left and say, `Away with you, you cursed ones, into the eternal fire prepared for the Devil and his demons! For I was hungry, and you didn't feed me. I was thirsty, and you didn't give me anything to drink. I was a stranger, and you didn't invite me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me no clothing. I was sick and in prison, and you didn't visit me.'
"Then they will reply, `Lord, when did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and not help you?' And he will answer, `I assure you, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me.'"
Matthew 25:34-45
What are you doing -- or REFUSING to do -- for Jesus?
As the song says, What Now?
What will you do? Will you pull a 'Moses' and argue with God? Or will you stand up right now and choose to follow Him?
Tremendous blessings await the Abrahams of today.
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8
I have often struggled with praying honestly, "Lord, use me. I am here to serve you as you see fit. Whatever you want for my life, I want. Nothing more. Nothing less. Nothing else. Lord, I want your will." You see, I am terribly afraid He will do it!
What if He asks me to uproot my family? Move across the globe? Start a time-consuming ministry in an unknown area? Give up things I hold dear? Step out of my comfort-zone? Help a needy person? Adopt an orphan or two? What if He just asks me to walk across the room and share the Gospel with a stranger? Or worse yet, a family member?!
I often feel like God is calling out, asking for volunteers to step up to the front...and I am sitting in the back, sliding down in my chair with my head bowed trying to hide from view. "Please don't pick me....please don't pick me..." You see, I have an idea of what my future is going to be. A plan. The schooling plan. The vacation plan. The retirement plan. So many plans.
"Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21
Why is it so difficult to trust God? I mean trust completely. No lip-service, while keeping a tight grip on our own plans. Trust Him.
"Here I am." I love that phrase in the Bible. It has really been jumping out at me lately. There are numerous examples of men answering God, "Here I am."
Such as Abraham in Genesis 22. Abraham obeyed immediately. No hesitation. No questioning. No rationalizing why he shouldn't do it. Immediate obedience. The result? Tremendous blessing. "I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore...and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me." He got to experience first-hand, Jehovah Jireh...the God who provides.
Then there's good ole Moses. His story in Exodus 3 is certainly not his finest hour. And yet, this is a story I can identify with. This is my paraphrase of what went down:
God: "I have seen. I have heard. I have come to rescue them. So, now go."
Moses: "Who, me?"
God: "I will be with you."
Moses: "But, what if no one listens...."
God: "Tell them I sent you. They will listen."
Moses: "But, what if they don't believe me..."
God: "I will perform miracles."
Moses: "But, I'm not qualified..."
God: "Go. I will help you."
Moses: "O Lord, please send someone else to do it."
Then the God got very frustrated with Moses.
Wow. As a mom, I want to send Moses to his room until he can obey immediately without whining and arguing! Seriously!
But, oh...how we are all like Moses. Isn't it easy to come up with excuses why you shouldn't have to do what God has told you to do? Reasons why it is someone else's calling and not yours?
Abraham or Moses? Who do you want to be like? I seem to be more like Moses, but desperately want to be more like Abraham.
When God opens your eyes to something that calls for action, DO SOMETHING! Be like Samuel and say, "Speak, for your servant is listening."
But what if He hasn't "called" you? You don't feel any great "calling" on your life?
Open your Bible. If you proclaim the name of Jesus...if you are a Christian and want to live a faithful life: Open your Bible. It doesn't take a scholar to find the "calls":
"Rescue those being led away to death; hold back those staggering toward slaughter. If you say, 'But we knew nothing about this,' does not he who weighs the heart perceive it? Does not he who guards your life know it? Will he not repay everyone according to what they have done?" Proverbs 24:11-12
"Pure and lasting religion in the sight of God our Father means that we must care for orphans..." James 1:27 NLT
"Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves..." Proverbs 31:8
"Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act." Proverbs 3:27
"But if anyone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need and refuses to help--how can God's love be in that person?" I John 3:17 NLT
"Whoever Welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me." Mark 9:37
Or how about this one:
"Then the King will say to those on the right, `Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.'
`Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? When did we ever see you sick or in prison, and visit you?' 'And the King will tell them, `I assure you, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!'"
"Then the King will turn to those on the left and say, `Away with you, you cursed ones, into the eternal fire prepared for the Devil and his demons! For I was hungry, and you didn't feed me. I was thirsty, and you didn't give me anything to drink. I was a stranger, and you didn't invite me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me no clothing. I was sick and in prison, and you didn't visit me.'
"Then they will reply, `Lord, when did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and not help you?' And he will answer, `I assure you, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me.'"
Matthew 25:34-45
What are you doing -- or REFUSING to do -- for Jesus?
As the song says, What Now?
What will you do? Will you pull a 'Moses' and argue with God? Or will you stand up right now and choose to follow Him?
Tremendous blessings await the Abrahams of today.
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8
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